Lissy Ann Puno
International Counselling & Psychology Centre, Singapore
Title: Affairs don’t just happen: A challenge to relationships and marriages
Biography
Biography: Lissy Ann Puno
Abstract
Relationships and Marriages have increasingly been faced with challenges of boredom, disillusionment and infidelity. Couples are finding themselves faced with the threat of ending the relationship sooner and find themselves at a loss on how to strengthen their relationships. Extra relational and extra marital affairs have been increasingly on the rise. Why has it gotten out of control? When is it out of control? Is addiction the culprit?
Several studies have seen parallel behaviors in one who is having an affair to one that is experiencing an addiction. What does this tell us about the relationship between infidelity and addictions? Because of this, can infidelity be solely attributed to sex addiction or influenced by other addictions?
An understanding of the stages of a love relationship is crucial. The theory of how the unconscious pull of attraction can eventually lead to disillusionment that creates vulnerability towards infidelity will be discussed. This period of vulnerability can indirectly be setting up the stage for an affair amidst the current trend of relationships being disposable and replaceable. Patterns of behavior amidst emotional turmoil will be identified as one may find themselves trapped in the web of intrigues, deception, shame and betrayal that comes with affair discovery. The pain, hopelessness and helplessness during this time may also lead to addictive behavior. Discover ways to nurture a relationship back into trust, safety and commitment through effective relational skills versus destructive and ineffective coping actions. Find ways to feel understood and valued through the years. Stay connected with your spouse to feel cherished and deeply connected as they experience each other at different stages of life.